Hey there! So tonight I am adding another category to my blog and it’s titled “Keeping it Real”! These post will be where I keep it real about myself as I apply it to my topic. It also may just be a topic I’d like to express myself about in a real way. So tonight’s first Keeping It Real post I’d like to discuss how we allow ourselves to be limited by our beliefs and mindsets. Let the real begin…
I grew up always feeling as though a man (since I only date men) is a provider for a woman. Anything opposite is just crazy. I always felt like I could relate to the housewife role who could sit at home, cook, clean, and care for children in exchange for her husbands love and money. (Most women can relate) In my head, that made perfect logical sense. I mean why have someone in my life if they can’t provide for me right? Well, now that I am a tad bit older and this new age comes with experience I can completely say that mind set & belief was completely limiting. Why? Well…. I know very well that 1). I was created to create and add to this world 2). I have so much more potential than to be a housewife for the exchange of leisure, love, and money and 3). What kind is boss chick expects others to pay her way?
Yes, those three things chimed into my head one day and it made me realize that my attitude towards hard work or dedication to something larger than myself was limiting me from being a greater woman. I had to ask myself, why settle for looking for handouts, when I could be the one handing out things to others? Instead of having my life in someone’s else’s hands why not gain full control of my own and make sure that I take care of myself in the same manner I expect a man to. Prior to this new level of consciousness I was completely allowing my old mindset and belief to limit me. That belief no longer served me and I was able to rise above it with awareness and take steps towards shifting my belief to “I am the provider for myself and I take amazing care of myself”.
It is so easy for us in this human experience to allow ourselves to be limited by our own beliefs. If I were aware years ago about how limiting this belief was, I assure you that I would have activated my self motivation a long time ago. But with that also being said, it’s important to be gentle with yourself because at least awareness is there now. I take absolute pride in my new level of consciousness and it gives me that much more fuel to go harder for myself.
I would use another example, but I think this one does justice. I am completely fine with applying an example to myself. I have no shame in exposing my thought or belief pattern with the world. Nothing can make be feel any less of myself. Plus, I know I am not the only one who can relate. I see so many other women with the same issue. Until you can be aware of your limiting beliefs, you won’t be able to rise above them and replace them. I honestly had to go through trial and error of trying to support myself off others money and I will tell you, it took me getting burned ( minor ways in my opinion, but still got burnt cause the stove was ON, and it was HOT!) a few times to finally realize that getting burned was MY FAULT. I was allowing my life, dreams, and ambition to be in the hands of another versus me having control of my own life, dreams, and ambition.
All it takes is simply being aware. Sometimes you can catch yourself before you get to close to the stove. Other times, it takes touching that stove and getting burned before you realize what’s really going on with you. I hope that after reading this, you are thinking of that specific belief that is limiting you. I hope that you have enough love and courage for yourself to be down with it tonight. If not, that is okay. But please don’t let it get to the point of having to get burned. Self love is doing what’s best for you, even when you don’t want to. Remember that. Be easy. (:
Stay tuned for next weeks Keeping It Real Post!
– Kaylen Zahara