It’s been a few weeks since my last post, I know… I’ve been seriously busy and a bit indecisive with what my next message would be. But don’t fret because today I have finally realized what I want to share with you.
As of the past two years I have personally been on a journey of reflecting on my dating habits and relationship patterns. It hasn’t been an easy process for me. It’s actually been a little emotionally and mentally draining to say the least.
Being honest with yourself about why relationships haven’t been so successful for you can be a bit discouraging. Who really wants to admit that the reason they haven’t found love is because they themselves have been out of alignment with love? Nobody. It’s so much easier to blame the people we’ve been dating for the failed attempt at love.
I’ve always been what I call obsessed with love … Since I can remember. Casually dating, serial dating, etc. Never really finding anyone or that perfect feeling. Blaming the guys who couldn’t give me what I was looking for. Crying and complaining as I move forward still searching for the same thing that I can’t seem to find.
Burnt out. Literally.
Well…. I happen to be 23 now & I assume with the help of Source (God, Universe, etc) and my choice of reflecting on my own patterns when it comes to love and dating, I have realized that my dating experiences have been such a draining fail because I have been dating for the intent of filling ego based needs, wants, and voids.
I have been confusing ego with love. Not to mention, I haven’t set specific intentions for each encounter I have with a guy. I just allow things to flow how they may, on top of seeking that guy to fulfill my ego based needs and wants.
Love is pure. Love has no relation to ego. Love is wholeness.
I have been stepping into relationships with the false perception that I am not whole and in order to be whole I must find love in a guy.
L O L
Love can only be found within because that is where it originates. In order for love to be found, I have to find myself. I have to know myself. I have to fill and release any ego needs, wants, and voids. I have to realize that I am whole and that no one can take or deplete me of love because I am love.
You have to be ready for this kind of self-reflection. It took a long time for me to accept and realize it all for what it is, but I am happy that it’s finally here. I am really grateful for the progression in all that I am aware of now. I have been really wanting change and I am willing to change in order to receive that change.
Now it will just take some consistent awareness of myself, my alignment with love, and whoever I encounter. I see myself being successful at it, but up until that success, I am already grateful for anything else I will learn and realize. I am ready for it.